May 17 2011

Things That One Should Know About Online Dating

Category: Online Dating Adviceadmin @ 5:54 am
online dating advice
by whatsthatpicture

What a strange title for an article, I write online dating advice so why would I encourage people not to read it?

Clearly I believe there is some good dating advice on the internet or I wouldn’t waste my time writing dating advice and tips but I want people to think about what they are reading and who the author is before they take anything they read as gospel.

Here are 5 things to carefully consider before you take the advice of dating “experts”.

1. Everything written is an opinion from someone with a given history. Just google “article writing+fee” and see how many people in countries like India offer to write articles for website owners for a fee. India is simply one example but life there is somewhat different on the dating scene and their knowledge may well come from watching re-runs of Baywatch and Dallas. Check who is writing the website content, do their articles all sound as though they are written by the same person, are they writing from a personal perspective and if so what is their dating history?

2. The words “expert” and “guru” are over-used and I rarely read advice from anyone calling themselves either. What qualifies someone as an expert at dating? If they have been constantly dating for 30 years then they either have commitment issues or are very bad at dating. Just take Dr Phil, would I read his advice on how to have a long and happy marriage? Absolutely but would I read his advice on dating in your 40′s in 2008? What does he really know about the current dating scene, he isn’t dating.

3. Dating advice that includes comments like “I can make you attractive to men/women even if you are fat and ugly”. Would you go into a clothes shop and accept advice from a shop assistant that called you fat and ugly? I doubt it, so why would you accept being insulted simply because it’s online. False promises of making you attractive to the opposite sex rely on your lack of confidence in order to get you to buy their book or video or whatever they are selling. Take advice from people that respect who you are and aren’t desperately trying to sell you something.

4. Beware of the bitter and twisted. Blogging is a platform for many types of people but that includes those that simply want to rant about their bad experiences. There are many dating blogs that simply catalogue a serious of disastrous dates, call men names and generalise about the opposite sex, particularly written by women in their 40′s but I have yet to read one that stops and asks herself if perhaps she is the problem. Avoid these blogs, they usually have no real constructive advice to offer.

5. The ones that state “I am the same as you so my advice is best for you”. Don’t just read advice from people of the same age, gender and situation, much can be learned from reading the thoughts of the opposite sex and older people that have been there, done that and bought the t-shirt. If you are recently divorced then don’t read advice by someone who is also recently divorced and trying to date again, find a writer that has been divorced, began dating again and is now in a long term relationship they have the experience you want to hear about.

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May 01 2011

7 Things You Should Not Talk About On The First Date

Category: Dating Guidesadmin @ 5:57 am
dating guides
by Mink

First dates are nerve-wracking and if you don’t know that topic to talk about, you might end up in an awkward [if not embarrassing] situation with your date. Women should be tactful when going out on dates may it be the first or the 3rd date with the same guy. The first date is an important time to get to know each other to establish the initial trust and openness. A wrong impression will always last, especially if it was made verbally.

Here are 7 stingy topics you should avoid:

1. Don’t talk about your exes

It is downright rude and insensitive when a woman talks about her ex for comparison’s sake on a first date. The guy would feel bad about having to date you because your mind is obviously still fixed on a past relationship. Even if you want to compare your ex to your current date, just keep the thought to yourself and talk about a more significant topic like your date’s hobbies and interests.

2. No politics, please!

Even if politics can be a good topic to discuss, it’s better left off alone or discuss any political issues vaguely without elaborating you opinion. A first date is not the best time for debacles and debates about political issues and views. Keep the atmosphere casual and inviting in order for your date to remember you better.

3. Let’s talk about sex…Not!

Even if sex may be inevitable on a first date for some women, but please, try not to talk about this sensitive topic. You may look and sound desperate when doing so and you could lose a potential long-time relationship if you talk about sex right away. It may be normal to have sex when you’re already dating him steadily and for a long time, but talking about it as early as the very first date is a major turn off for most guys. You’ll either lose his respect or you may end up together briefly just because of physical reasons.

4. Avoid talking about religious faiths

Although religion or faith is an important matter to both man and woman, talking about it on a first date can either make or break a possible relationship. Religion is an important factor and most couples need to be compatible with this aspect of their lives in order to keep the relationship harmonious.

5. Don’t talk about showbiz gossips, most men hate it

No matter how much you love Brangelina, your date won’t get it. Talk about those celebrities with your gal pals since they can understand where you’re coming from. He might even think that you’re out-of-touch with reality if you keep on thinking and talking about Hollywood celebs instead of your hobbies. So keep it real and let him know the person that you are instead of talking about other people’s lives.

6. Avoid talking about marriage at this stage

You don’t want to send your date running off with topics like marriage, wedding planning, engagement and things associated with marriage. You only talk about marriage with a guy who has been with you for a long time. Don’t ruin your initial meeting by bombarding him with this very serious topic.

7. Money may be an interesting topic, but it’s a big NO-NO during a first date

Even if it’s tempting to ask for his salary or how much credit limit he has or how much debt is he in, it is best to discuss this once you end up in a relationship with this guy. The first date should be a fun and social way of getting to know him as a person.

Remember that when you out on a first date, the guy you’re with may also be stressed and anxious about the things that you might ask him. Put him in a more comfortable position by talking about topics that are beneficial to both of you such as your interests, hobbies and life experiences. Giving your date this initial favor can garner you a second, third or even more dates to come because he will find you a wholesome, trustworthy and fun lady to be with.

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Jan 17 2011

Dating Tips – Fun Things to Do On a First Date

Category: Dating Tipsadmin @ 12:35 pm

The first date can be the most nerve wracking.  You don’t want to be in an embarrassing or awkward situation with nothing to say and nothing to talk about or do.  That’s why it’s a good idea to have a plan and to also have an emergency back up plan if things aren’t going so smoothly.  It may save the date and even wind up the most memorable part of the night.  Here are three dating tips to do on a first date.

Dating tip #1: Use index cards.  Don’t write out questions on index cards to ask your date.  It can seem too much like an interview and you lose the natural ebb and flow of a conversation by reading off an index card.  You can rely too much on a crutch and not trust your own intuition and gut on how the date is going.  In addition, you’re probably too nervous to actually listen to the answers as you’re focused on asking the next question.  Instead, use the index cards to have fun on a first date by making it a game.  You can give your date a blank index card to write the answer to a question before they ask the question.  Their answer on the index card is what they think your answer would be.  There are many different variations of games you can play like this, and it could be a good way to break the ice and get into a more comfortable mood.  The point is not to rely on any props or activities, but to use them to loosen up and get past the point of awkwardness so that you can be yourself.

Dating tip #2: Use what’s around you.  Something that both of you can do together is to imagine what other people around you are saying or talking about based on their body language.  If there is a couple a couple of tables away, you can make it a game and come up with dialogue as if you’re the screenwriter and they are actors in your screenplay.  Bringing humor and a light-hearted attitude into your first date can break down a lot of walls and insecurities between the two of you.  It would also be beneficial to use that laughter as a starting point to talk about more intimate things, like your dreams and what’s important to you.

Dating tip #3: Talk about movies.  I’ve never met a person who didn’t watch or like movies.  Even the most hardened critic still has a few that he/she likes.  With that said, movies are always a good bet to talk about and will always open the door to remembering funny scenes or touching points.  And because movies deal with story structures that often involve a compelling moral or character transformation, there’s a lot of material to talk about, moving beyond the general statements like “that movie was great,” or “it was just ok.”

Matchmaking has a way of bringing two people together that are compatible and on the same page about their relationship goals.  Starting off on a first date with someone you know is compatible with you is a great way to feel comfortable and ease your way into a first date.  There’s no need to impress or try to be someone you’re not.  All you need to is focus on having a great first date, and hopefully these three dating tips will help you have a great time.

Allan Tan is an experienced writer on seeking dating and relationships. He has been writing for many years and has had many articles published. Some of Allan’s most favorite topics to write on include single professionals, mature daters, relationships, and matchmaking. Allan’s articles are well written and memorable. They are especially great for anyone looking to begin dating and still keep up with their daily activities.

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Dec 21 2010

Dating Tips For Teenage Girls: Four Fun Things To Do

Category: Dating Tipsadmin @ 6:37 pm

Going on a first date can be awkward for boys as well as girls. You and your date both want to make a good impression on each other. You’re probably both a little nervous and conversation may come hard.

There are some things you can do, however, to break the ice on that first date. And while you’re breaking the ice, you can be observing your guy to decide whether you want a second date with him.

Dating Tips for Teenage Girls #1: Go to a Movie or Concert

This will allow you to spend a few hours together without struggling to find something to say. Afterwards, the show you just saw will give you plenty to talk about. While you’re evaluating the show, you can be evaluating your date as well. Do you and he share a sense of humor or a similar sense of values? Does he laugh at things you find offensive?

Dating Tips for Teenage Girls #2: Do Something Physical

Go indoor rock climbing, challenge him to a good, hard game of tennis, or suggest a bowling match. Until you know him better, avoid activities like hiking that will put the two of you together in an isolated area. Observe his attitude and see how does he react if you win? Does he get sullen and resentful, or is he pleased for you?

Dating Tips for Teenage Girls #3: Double (or Triple, or Quadruple) Date

Go out with other couples to get some pizza or see a movie. The more people there are, the more easily the conversation flows. Watch your date as he interacts with other people. How does he treat the other girls? Is he pleasant, or does he make crude remarks that annoy the others?

Dating Tips for Teenage Girls #4: Make a Study Date

Meet at the library to catch up on school work. Most libraries have private rooms study buddies can reserve. As you work and chat together, observe his behavior. Does he do his share, or does he count on you to do the majority of the work? Does he know how to work through a problem, or does he get easily frustrated?

A first date can be every bit as awkward as a job interview. But these dating tips for teenage girls will allow you to have fun with your date, while at the same time keeping an eye out for personality traits you may find undesirable.

Ann Marier writes informative articles on general health issues providing helpful tips and advice. Her latest articles about dating include a dating guide for online dating and the possible dangers.

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